How Do You Really Tell A Girl that You Love Her?

How do you tell a girl you love her? These days, it seems like it’s hard to find true love. So many of us are looking for something casual or fleeting that it makes it difficult to tell if your relationship with a person is genuine or merely a matter of convenience.



Still, when you do have that strong feeling, and you are ready to say the L word, it can feel like a ton of pressure, especially if you don’t know how the other person feels towards you. As a result, you may be too nervous to say it, but that would be a mistake.
Unless you are thinking of expressing yourself to a girl who doesn’t even know you exist, then odds are it’s better to throw it out there than bottling it up inside. Don’t be afraid to say how you feel for fear of rejection, as it’s always better to be up front about such things.
That being said, here are some tips and tricks to make sure that you do it in the right way without making it seem too forward or awkward in the process.
 
Is This Love?
First and foremost, it’s imperative that you analyze your feelings to understand what they are. For some people, infatuation is the same as love, but the problem with that is that when your initial feeling wears off, there is usually nothing to support them in the long run. The best way to figure out if you really love someone is to think about all of the negative aspects of your relationship and see how it affects your perception. Have you spent enough time with this person to know how she is like all the time? Are there any quirks or personality traits that turn you off? If so, are they deal breakers?
Simply put, if you want to make sure that you are really in love, then you should try your hardest to make her as unattractive as possible and see if you still want to be with her. If so, then you are most likely ready to say “I love you.”

How Does She Feel?

Unfortunately, as much as you can think about and analyze your own feelings, it’s impossible to know exactly what is on her mind. As such, you want to try to figure out if she is feeling the same way without making it obvious. The reason for that is because if you express yourself and she doesn’t reciprocate, that could change your relationship dynamic.
No matter what, though, you have to understand that she is a person too with thoughts and feelings, and just because you have a particular idea of what your relationship is doesn’t mean that she feels the same way. The most important thing is that you respect her feelings and wishes regardless of what happens. Ideally, she’ll feel the same way about you, but if not, don’t try to force anything.
Of interest: a scientific gender view of saying I love you from Psychology Today.

Best Methods for Saying I Love You

Once you’ve worked up the nerve to take the plunge, how should you bring it up? If you want to make it sound genuine, then you have to wait for the right time and place; otherwise, it will make the sentiment feel tacky or fake. In the end, you want her to understand where you’re coming from so that she knows how you truly feel about her.

In Person

Overall, the best way to say it is to her face so that you can watch her reaction and talk about it afterward. The most important thing to remember here is that you want to be as open and honest about your feelings and you don’t want to seem like it’s an afterthought or that you’re rushing to say it. With that in mind, don’t blurt it out but also don’t hype it up too much. Too often we tend to over talk when trying to say something that could be uncomfortable, but in this case, brevity is your best option so that you can focus more on the aftermath than the buildup.

Pro Tips

  • Look her in the eyes when you say it
  • Make sure that she understands that you’re saying it for real, rather than as a platitude
  • Give her time to process, so don’t rush to follow up with questions or an explanation
  • Be honest about your feelings

Romantic Gesture

Another great way to say “I love you” is to do it with an action as well as your words. However, this can be a tricky situation depending on your relationship, so you will want to take this route if things are already intimate or romantic between the two of you. If you’re “just friends” and you’re trying to take things to the next level, a romantic dinner or love serenade can backfire quickly if she doesn’t reciprocate. In the end, a grand gesture is an excellent way to show her how you feel as well as make sure she understands how much you’re willing to do to be with her.

Pro Tips

  • Make it a surprise, but don’t put a lot of pressure on her (such as doing it in front of people)
  • Keep it straightforward; don’t go overboard
  • Focus on what makes her special and unique, rather than something generic (bouquet of flowers, for example)

Handwritten Letter

Finally, another way to let her know how you feel is to write a love letter to her. If you are afraid that you’ll stumble over your words or that you’ll ruin the moment, a letter is a great way to express yourself while giving her time to process the information and react on her own time. In the end, however, it’s much better to give her the letter in person and have her read it in front of you instead of delivering it to her and waiting for a response. The purpose of a letter is to articulate your feelings, not to put distance between you.

Pro Tips

  • Write several drafts to make sure that the final result is clean and polished
  • Keep it short and simple and to the point
  • Make sure that she knows what the letter is about before handing it to her
In the end, saying “I love you” can be a wonderful and magical experience. Even if she doesn’t say it back, the important thing is that you took a chance and went for it. It’s better to express yourself honestly rather than regret not saying anything later on.



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